Uh, fucking GAG me…
Yeah boo-fuckin-hoo- you’re trying to get out, we’re all trying to get in to that spot God damn it.
Anyway…
Aside from that being everyone’s main complaint, my main complaint is a little different. I can pretty much tolerate every little billionaire heiress boobing about how their life is just so hard, what I really cannot handle is the wannabe famous B and C List stars thinking they are more famous than they really are, and also telling us all about their problems.
If you are still clueless after I just said all that, I envy you because you haven’t been subjected to it, or you’re probably just not as much of a TV junkie as me.
For the rest of us, that statement screams Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt. As much as I wish they would go back to the factory and get re-melted down for parts, they are just like a fucking train wreck--- I cannot peel my little eyes away. Both of you: Get a fucking clue, the whole world doesn’t love you, neither of you are exceptionally beautiful or talented, yet you both walk around batting away the imaginary paparazzi that are just figments of your imaginations. I honestly didn’t know it was possible for two completely separate people to have the exact same delusion or hallucination at the same time, that has got to me some medical or scientific phenomenon or something…
The most recent thing going on with them of course is Heidi’s plastic surgery overhaul. Does anyone really care that she hated herself so much beforehand that she felt it necessary to get the surgeries? For the most part, no- most of us were basically not all that surprised by it. And although she can (and will) keep getting those surgeries, she, nor her husband, will ever understand that you cannot change the inside by changing the outside… Especially if you started out as a lifeless mannequin with no personality whatsoever...
The best part about the whole thing is Heidi’s supposed complaint about Spencer not having sex with her because she wants to get pregnant, and he doesn’t want that to happen. I want to know why her solution is to go and spend ridiculous amounts of money to alter her body. That is absurd for a couple key reasons. The first one is she JUST spent all that crazy money on all those modifications, does she not know that pregnancy basically wrecks your body from the inside out, even the parts you’ve paid for? Mother Nature is not going to just skip you over and say “Oh Heidi my dear, I don’t want to ruin all the work your doctor has done!” There is no fairy dust to keep from having your body change from something as major as bearing a child.
The second big reason that now being pregnant would be bad is you’ve got to realize that whatever children you naturally produce are going to look like the pre-surgery you, your personal alterations don’t alter your genes and DNA. If you hated the natural you and your kids come out looking like that, are you going to resent them in any way because they remind you of what you didn’t like about yourself? Or when they get old enough will you encourage them to get surgery themselves so they can have the bad self image you have?
Oh wait, I have another reason they shouldn’t reproduce: Its Spencer and Heidi... That is reason enough.
This close-to novel length entry should be enough on this subject, so in ending I just want to say: All you real celebrities, suck it up and quit bitching about how rough your cushy little lives are, or live to your words- go (back) to a life where nobody knows who you are, in your fashions from the Walmart clearance racks, working 2 full time jobs paying minimum wage, still living paycheck to paycheck, living in a studio apartment… after you make that transition, THEN let me know really “how terrible and hard” your lovely star lifestyle is.
As for Heidi and Spencer: Just GO AWAY.
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